Time for yourself....

"Someone" introduced me to the concept of sitting in the sun for 30 minutes and basically meditating.  Can't say I've got my head wrapped around meditation but I like the idea.  And honestly I shouldn't say sun, just outdoors, even if a cloudy day....fresh air, exposed, free to let the mind wander or be still.

Today I sat outside....had been working hard so had on capri length yoga pants and a workout fitted tank.  Was a bit chilly so brought a quilt with me and sat in the sun....what a pick me up!  So great to have been working hard and take a break so basic, so simple.  Too bad we forget these things.  I want to live with purpose, not forget the simple things in life and to appreciate them.  Slow down.  That is counter to what society has ingrained into us lately.  The buzz word seems to be multitasking yet think about it. That is a tech definition but c'mon!  Execute on several distributed processors....well first off we have ONE brain, one person.

SIMULTANEOUSLY!  So, chat on the phone with your bff....unload the dishwasher and make a grocery list.  Is your bff getting the best of you?  Are you really listening?  Do you hear the tears or hesitation in her voice?  Slow down.  When was the last time you really lost yourself in a conversation.  A REAL conversation.  Deep.  Significant.  Put yourself there, drop the multitasking and be IN the moment.  Those are the things that count.  So what if you die and the dishwasher wasn't loaded?  Get that conversation in.  Make those memories.  Do what matters, really matters and do it with meaning and your entire being engaged.  Don't short change the people in your life.

So....yes. I sat in the sun.  Didn't even read today.  Often I do, but today, I enjoyed the slight breeze that made it a bit too cool to be without my quilt, and the warmth of the sun hitting my arms and legs.  The sounds of outside and the neighborhood, the sound of my daughter inside. My sweet Cowboy who had to wander up next to me on the little perch of a patio and stand on the edge just so he could be right next to me.  His soft fur and the way he pushed his nose into my face to plant a sloppy wet one on me.  If I was involved in other things at the same time, I'd have missed all the joy in that 30 minutes.  Simple....meditation, one step at a time.  Once a day to start.  Appreciating.

Sending a huge thank you to my special someone that brought that into my life.  One thing he said after the first time we sat in the sun together?  "I like that we don't have to talk and it's ok to be quiet."  Warmth spread in my heart.  It is, thank you for giving me that.

When it's time to change.....

When I think of change, that Brady Bunch episode where Peter's voice is chainging and the family sings "When it's Time for Change" always pops in my head and yes, I'll be singing it for the rest of the day.  Now that I've mentioned the song, those of you that are of the same generation will hopefully also be singing along.

Change is hard.  The idea and determination can come upon us, as it has me.  I have to stay motivated and in trying to do so, I've run across an article written by Stephenie Zamora for GalTime.com.   One thing she talks about that is so needed in making change is to:

1) Create a tribe of supportive, like-minded people.
This is soooooo, so important to making positive changes in your life! I can't stress it enough. When I was experiencing my quarter-life crisis, I felt so lost and confused as to who I was and what I wanted… despite seeming to have everything. It was incredibly isolating because I felt like no one else would understand.

The truth is I wasn't alone, and neither are you. Just because those like-minded people don't presently exist in your life, doesn't mean they're not out there experiencing the SAME EXACT thing as you… wishing they had someone to relate to as well. No matter what you're going through or what you want to create for yourself, I promise you, there are hundreds of thousands of people out there who want the same thing for themselves.

You are a unique and beautiful person, yes, but your situation is surprisingly common, regardless of what it is. This is known for sure.

Whether you're introverted or extroverted, you need people in your life who you can really open up to. People who will understand, love and support you.

You also need accountability! When you're trying to move toward a goal or big life shift, you need support, no matter how smart, capable or driven you are. Accountability puts you on the fast track to making amazing things happen.

Here are three ways to create that support tribe:

    Find a meetup.com group around a goal you're working toward. This could be a runner's group, business mastermind or writer's group.

    Join a program, workshop or class. Not only will you be connected to like-minded people working toward the same goal, you'll learn something as well, AND have the added accountability of the coach or teacher.

    Find an online or virtual community. If you can't find any classes or local meetups, there is nothing wrong with a virtual tribe. Some of the most supportive and loving individuals in my life are people I have yet to meet face-to-face. Log on and find a Facebook group, website forum or online program or community.

I buy into that, how bout you?  I guess that was in my gut, that I'm not alone in making changes, that I want more and better, but I can't do it alone.  I'm going to need motivation, inspiration and some good conversation.  I want to create deep, authentic friendships.  And, so, my friends.....post?  Or how is best to create this group of people to talk and who regularly want to talk?  Would love feedback.  I think I've got all fixed so that comments are enabled.....getting used to letting this blog go public.  

Looking for your feedback and more convo....love you all!

Two favorite books....and a blog

Over the years I've been pursuing the simple life, sustainability, living frugally...one concept?  No it's a mix, honestly.  I pick and choose what I like and what hits me from many different sources, putting into play my favorites.

About 15 years ago I ran across Tracey McBride's books, the first being Frugal Luxuries.  People often equate frugal with cheap, however I see it completely different.  To live frugally means that I am saving money in ways that I deem acceptable so that I have funds to spend on things that I enjoy.  It does NOT mean that I will buy the cheapest things out there and will sit at home with the lights off to save money.  It's simply a matter of choosing priorities as to where your money goes that gives you the most enjoyment and satisfaction.

I love the challenge of bargain hunting.  I think it was Walmart (of all places...not a favorite of mine) that had a commercial a few years back around Christmas where the woman in it was a "bargain looker-outer" and she did the hovering circular motion with her hands.  I really connected with that....I am an incredible bargain looker-outer.  I love the thrill of finding the best deal for things, of wandering through the local consignment store and finding that amazing Chicos Jean Jacket embellished with all kinds of jewels for $10 that looks brand new (true recent story).  These kind of things leave me the funds to spend on travel or my home or a tree I've wanted in my yard, or an incredible dinner out at Tokyo Steakhouse with my kids.  Things others might consider frivolous, but that I get great enjoyment out of.

And then there are frugal luxuries.  Roses cut from my backyard in an old pickle jar on my side-table.  A ten-cent garage sale find of an old handkerchief with little pansies all over it that I keep in my purse.  These things cost basically nothing, but are little luxuries that I completely cherish and put a smile on my face.  Let Tracey teach you about Frugal Luxuries on her website or through one of her books.  Not sure I'll loan one of mine out, they are too valuable to me, but I'll help you find one.

Simple Living

It means getting rid of many of the things you do so you can spend time with people you love and do the things you love. It means getting rid of the clutter so you are left with only that which gives you value.

Here I am again.....please go read zenhabits.net and explore the site.  This post is screaming at me right now....

Simple Living Manifesto: 72 Ideas to Simplify Your Life    By Leo Babauta

ooohhhmmmm......

This is a repost of a November 2010 post that means a lot to me at this time.  Went back to read the article I refer to in it and the link didn't work so wanted to fix it.....couldn't edit it that far back so what a great reason for a repost!

I need to take up meditation or something and gain some zen moments in my life.  Peace, simplicity, basics.  I get so overwhelmed running around, trying to be everything to everybody and still falling way short and being on the receiving end of undeserved blame, anger, ugliness.  The nasty words constantly take a toll and I just can't take it.  THUS....I hide in my room.  Read, play online games, talk to friends on voice chat.  BLOG.

Stephen Hopson says "do what makes YOU happy FIRST and then if people want to adjust, accept or reject you, that’s their business.   Our job is to take care of ourselves.   Yes, you have to balance it out and compromise along the way, of course.  But if you consistently go out of your way to make others happy,  allowing your wants and desires to fall by the wayside, guess what will happen?

You’ll experience a range of emotions from depression, sadness, anger, resentment or bitterness.  And the funny thing is you’re the one that put yourself in that position!   It has nothing to do with the other person.  All the other person did was to say what he/she wants and you went along with it."

OMG do I relate.  Click on the link in his name and read more.  I need to dig my heels in and live by this.  I've let the opinion and hurt of others sway me in this many times and no more.  I can not be what I need to be if I don't take care of me.  I'll have nothing to give.  Help me stick to this.

Things that make me happy...

Simplicity.  Nature, plants, gardening.  Being in the moment.  Someone special to share with who understands these things about me.  Ultimately yes that someone special I would love to be a man.  BUT....also need friends, family, my babies.  Hope people will join me in this journey and be open and authentic.  Non-judgemental.  Make new friendships and plain old enjoy life in it's simplicity and abundance.  Realizing that everything in your life is affected by your choice and YES YOU HAVE A CHOICE.  I am choosing the road to happiness and creating memories, join me?  I want to expand this blog, create a resource list, inspiration, whatever it may be.

Yes it's going to hurt.  We keep pieces of ourselves locked away but I'm going for authentic, excellent conversations here.  Not what people expect, no parroting, just heartfelt, caring convos.  This will help me identify the "real" people that I want to be a part of my life.  With this transparency and honesty, age is no issue.  Join me. Learn to care and love with me.  Learn to choose what is best for you.

Disclaimer....I'm no expert on anything.  I stumble lots, my balance is off kilter.  Say a word,I'll sing you a song containing that word.  On key?  Not a clue.  Just with pure joy.  If you are not afraid to be you, come help.  Not afraid to ask for that.  Life is our adventure and is what we make it. 

Technology....random thoughts

I ADORE, A.D.O.R.E., scream it from the mountains adore.....technology.  Yet, I can hate it with a passion that makes someone talking to me about it at the time cringe. 

But.....learning and education at our fingertips constantly?  Ability to share with my family, all four siblings at once via a medium called FaceBook?  Pinterest....perfect way for this visual creature to sort and find things....Google Reader to keep track of blogs I like to read.  What can I say?  BRING IT ON!  Way too easy to get distracted, side tracked, lost in another line of thought than what brought me in but oh well.....love the roads traveled to get to where I'm going.

This is a picture of my desk this morning.  Yes, my mug of 641.3373 (that is coffee for you non-bibliophiles), my bowl with my apple core and packet of organic plain grain cereal, stacks of items for cataloging from scratch (shivers at the thought) and my library link and my link of pure selfish interest.....clean eating.  Need to stay mega healthy now that I've lost all the weight.

OK, my personal favorite thing about technology?  Well, seems to be panning out to be my favorite although I went through a love/hate with it for a while....online dating.  Only reason it's in the favorable column at this time is yes, there is someone special and yes, we've made a decision to pursue a LTR.  That's Long Term Relationship for those of you not into text-speak.  If you had talked to me on a day when things weren't going so well, yea, hate online dating.  But at this age in my life, where am I going to meet men?  Men who aren't looking for a "newer model"?  

Lucked out.  Meet John Stacy Underwood.  Good man.